Toolbox For Faith

Most congregations want to be better hosts to their new worshipers, but the question is how. Pastor David Derrick (St. Philip Lutheran Church, Roanoke, VA) and I put together a checklist of Hospitality Ideas that could help an individual or team of people who are trying to become more welcoming. These are simple, basic ideas, but hopefully they can help establish new patterns and new behaviors. You don’t need to do all seven at once, but try one or two and then considering adding another. If you have other ideas for simple, welcoming activities that we could add to the list, please let me know.

1. When the service is over, intentionally go to someone you don’t know well and greet that person before reconnecting with your friends in the congregation.
2. If your congregation “Passes the Peace,” feel free to move out of your section to share God’s peace with someone on the other side of the sanctuary.
3. Call someone whom you haven’t seen in worship recently and just say, “Hello.”
4. Sit somewhere different one Sunday morning and engage the people around you in conversation.
5. Arrive early for worship and walk around the sanctuary to make sure things are neat and straight.
6. Arrive early for worship and walk through the restrooms to make sure they are neat and well stocked with supplies.
7. If your congregation offers activity bags for young children, take a moment to see if they are well stocked and easy to find.

I learn lessons good and bad when I worship at another church which my wife and I did last Sunday on vacation. This was our experience.

As we walked up to the building, we discovered that this Lutheran church had entrances to the sanctuary on both sides of the building along with doors to the lower level. Of course, we initially chose the wrong door. Inside each door were directions but not outside. A man inside the wrong door told us which door to choose.

We climbed the steps to the sanctuary where we were met by two women. We had to wait about a minute as the women were talking to someone else when we arrived. Since we were standing by a table with bulletins, we took one. The first woman finally greeted us with a “Good morning” and then she said to the other woman who was holding a stack of bulletins, “They already have bulletins.” The two women began to discuss whether the second woman should get the rest of the bulletins so that people would not pick them up before they were given a bulletin. I offered to put mine back so that she could give me one but she laughed and said to keep it. The service did not have an exchange of peace so that was all that was said to me until after the service.

As I opened the bulletin, I noticed that the order for worship took up a little over half of the inside page. The outline did not list everything and contained no worship directions or help which told me that the bulletin was not designed for anyone who was not familiar with the practices at that church. I almost goofed when I started to stand for the hymn of the day but thankfully glanced around before standing to see everyone else sitting.

As the pastor started the announcements, he began by recognizing a man and woman and welcomed them back. People in front looked to the right so I did, too, but I had no idea whom he was talking about nor why. I also noticed that the pastor never welcomed guests which told me that they were not expecting any non-members. We were never asked to sign anything to indicate who we were so there was no way they could follow up on our visit.

The sermon started weak but finished with a strong to-the-point story. Shortly after starting, the pastor talked about how he felt guilty when he did not live up to the standard of the story of the Good Samaritan as if the point of the story was to establish guilt rather than motivating helpful actions. Guilt only creates more guilt and nothing happens except feeling guilty. Thank goodness, the pastor finished with a great illustration which everyone could take with them. That was the best part of the service. The story was so good I am planning on using it the first opportunity I have.

A soloist with an excellent voice sang “In Remembrance of Me” while the offering was collected. I love the song and it is so meaningful when sung before, during or after Holy Communion. As I heard the words, “In remembrance of me, eat this bread,” I kept thinking this would have been much more appropriate on a Sunday when the congregation celebrated Holy Communion which they were not doing this Sunday.

The service concluded with the congregation singing a closing song which was not listed in the bulletin and which I had never heard before—something that I thought was almost impossible after a lifetime of years in worship. The postlude was joyous and wonderful which made me wonder why the organist had not played with such enthusiasm and power during the service.

On the way out as we waited in line to speak to the pastor, only one person—a grey haired woman–spoke to me. She said, “Good Morning” to which I responded “Good morning, I hope you have a wonderful day” as she kept walking past. People all around were talking to each other but not to us. The pastor was very friendly and welcoming but no one else spoke to me after worship.

I left feeling that the church had a core group who knew each other and were probably very happy with the church but the experience taught me that they are not interested in welcoming new people. If I had moved to that community and was looking for a church home, I would have found another church to attend next Sunday.

Congregations are always looking for helpful ways to gather information about new worshipers. For a while everyone used the “Visitor Book” and then we all switched to the “Friendship Pad” at the end of the pew. At St. Michael we use a version of the “Welcome Sheet” that my father used in his ministry.

Each week, we place an insert in the bulletin that captures information from all worshipers. There is a spot for name, address and email address. There are places for prayer requests and communion information. There is also a box which is changed each week to gather information on short term ministry opportunities. You can see an example of the “Welcome Sheet” here. The “Welcome Sheet” allows everyone to have something to put in the bulletin and has proven to be a very useful tool for gathering information from both new and long-term worshipers.

If you are interested in what the church looks like from the outside looking in, you might enjoy Jim and Casper Go to Church, the story of a long-time Christian and an atheist who go to visit several churches and share their observations.  You can find it on Amazon here. I pulled together a few of my favorite passages along with a few comments into a document if you would like to get a flavor of the book: Passages from Jim and Casper Go to Church .